lazy line painter jayne

i need a bigger pot.

im donating all my once beloved concert t-shirts... except for Garbage which will probably join the ranks of sleep shirts soon. i have too much clothes... in 6th grade i use to wear like the same thing for days. not that i didnt have anything else, i just really really liked my shirts (especially that damn CocaCola bear in his lowrise jeans with his underwear showing. i thought it was the funniest damn thing ever). and especially if they were way to big for me. (i think cause i didn't like the fact that i was getting boobies. and big shirts hid that). and of course people made fun of me for it. i think over the years i ended up over compensating. but now im trying to undo it. or at least just get rid of half my stuff and just do laundry more often instead of just buying new stuff when im out of clean things.

I think im finally growing out of myself. or at least my wardrobe..i dunno..i feel like my rebellious teen phase was much to mellow and not so rebellious. or im growing out of it all much to quickly..(or not quickly enough? im going to be 20 next year...) not that i was ever a big trouble maker or anything. okay, so maybe a little vandalism and shoplifting. and illicit late night rendezvous. but not really much more than that. I expected my "wild" phase to be much more.. wild. maybe it's hard to live upto the craziness of my older sister. but I just feel like im constantly giving up and settling for the typical and not even caring any more. i just want things to be simple. maybe its because im just too lazy. the only problem (or relief?) is there is still that part of me that comes up every once and a while and gets really upset about whatt im turning into and yells at me, although sometimes she admits some changes are better... but im glad she's at least still there to keep me in check.

"a slave to the IKEA
nesting instinct. What
kind of dining set defines

me

as a person"

posted by jayne @ 1:19 AM